Wieght gain

Okay so putting on weight is a really hard thing to do. It will take time and you will look different but you won't be fat. You won't be overweight. You will just look healthy like a normal person, really who just want to be skin and bones. You will actually look better and prettier when you can't see all the bones in your arms or every rib. One thing I was terrified of was not being about to see my clavicles (bone by your neck) and my ribs, but you know I have put on 7kg and I can still see them, I still have 5kg to f but I'm not worried any more, not at all! I am liking how my new body looks, yes it is different but a good different.

Start with throwing out all your tenny tiny old clothes, they won't fit you. And they can just be triggering to see them every time you go to get dressed . But think on the bright side, you can go shopping!! Get new clothes that actually fit! And look nice on you!

When I first started putting on weight and still am I get really bloated and all the 'fat' seems to be going to my stomach and legs, but it will even out. It is just going there to cover vital organ and to prepare your body for if it falls into starvation mode again, so it goes to the most important places first, it will spread out and you probably won't see a difference when it does evenly spread, this just takes a couple of months to do. And remember that when you are at a healthy weight you will probably look thinner than when you were still putting on weight as a lot of it will just be water fat or water weight. This happens because your body is not use to getting enough food and just wants to hang onto it for as long as possible, storing it as a liquid. So it will disappear when you are eating regularly.

Something that helps is not to know how much you weigh. You will be putting on weight in recovery but you will not know how much, for all you know you might not be able to see a difference in your body therefore think you are not putting on weight when you are actually putting on X amount each week. This helped me a lot . If I couldnt tell I put on Xkg how could I tell when I put on X more?! I couldnt! Sorry I didn't explain that one very well...

Weight gain is hard to cope with and you will feel like falling back into your old habits. But when you get use to your 'new' body you will love it a lot more. It looks nicer your skin won't be all pale and seethrought ish your hair will be less greasy and have a nice shine to it, and you will have tonnes more energy. You won't miss being cold all the time and not being able to do exercise at all having to sit still and being in a wheelchair. You won't miss that, you will be to busy loving your new body :)

Fight those evil words in your head and concur them! I believe in you!