Do something to boost your confidence!

New week at school tomorrow and I don't know about you but my anxiety is really getting to me (GAD) so what better time is it then to change something about my look to boost my confidence, why don't you do it this week as well? Go on I dare you! I personally love my hair but sometimes my frizzy fluffy wavey hair just gets too much so this week my hair is turning strait! Yep last time my hair was strait I got really good comments on how nice it looked and how I suited it really well from all my friends and that made me feel good so I think while I am still in my patch of things are tough kind of time I think it help get me through it, so yeah I temporally have strait hair! So if you have curly hair why not straiten it and if you have strait hair why not curl it?! And if you really don't like it you can always wash it out before school/work simply fixed! Or maybe paint your nails if allowed at your school, I'm not sadly :(  maybe put on a little mascara or lipgloss even little things like this can get you through and make you happy and give you confidence so why not?! Or if you don't have to wear a uniform wear something new or change your style just for one week, try it see how you feel. And if it makes you feel good why not do it more often. I know change of routines and 'normal' are hard to cope with trust me I know, little things can upset me but getting through the anxiety will do you good in the long term! And you might find something you like, so go on try something new this week with me!!

Changing thoughts

I know how hard anxiety can be, trust me I know but it does get better I promise you just have to learn the process of changing all those negative thoughts to positive ones.
Some examples may just be as easy as if you are thinking : There are too many people around try changing this thought into yay there are lots are people around to help me if anything does go wrong (which nothing will) or if its something along the lines of : I can't do it just change it to well yes I can do it and believe this new thought you have put into your head think really hard and your body will start to believe it too. It is a really hard thing to do especially when you are in panic mode but with lots of practice you start to do it naturally. You can do it face you fear!!

Me

Hi I am Livvy. I am in my mid teens and live in beautiful New Zealand. I would like to consider myself as a happy normal teenager with no problems what so ever but my life just isn't that...I have genralized anxiety disorder (GAD), mild depression, and a eating disorder...well kind of its a long story... I was in hospital for a week with a kidney infection :( and couldn't eat anything, I lost a LOT of weight, I weighed only 38kg. I saw the deititon there and she really wasn't happy with me, because even before I had lost weight I still only weighed 43 as my heaviest which is 7kg under what I should weigh at my height of 160 cm. She asked me lots of questions about what I ate and it turned out I was eating the amount a 6yr old should... I honestly didn't know! Anyway as I had been eating like this since I was about 12 my stomach had shrunk lots so I couldn't eat a normal emount of food. Then my anxiety got to me about putting on weight so I stopped having my supplements and all the weight I would put on I couldn't keep on so yeah.you get the basics. So I am struggling with food at the moment in recovery, I hope..

My anxiety was really bad at the start of the year, I missed over 4 weeks of school in total because I was making up excuses not to go to school, was so nervous my mum took pity on me or that my anxiety got to the point where I convinced myself that it wasn't anxiety and I was actually sick. For 3 weeks I was so anxious I was throwing up every morning before school, I spent most of my day in the councellers office, I couldn't concentrate in class at all I learnt nothing I was either trying not to throw up again, burst into tears, calming myself down..well trying to, and there was so my thoughts about bad things happening I just was beside myself. Know one really knows how it feels to have an anxiety dissorder unless you have had one. For those of you who don't know it terrible you feel like being sick, are sick, can't breathe, heart pounds, headaches almost as bad as migraines, you get all sweaty haha, and much much more. They were just the basics too each person has their own symptoms. Personly I lose my appetite which also kind of helped we devlopeave my ED as you can imagine .

My depression isn't that bad. It isn't diagnosed or anything, but I do know what it feels like to want to end your life. I get it with my anxiety and ED it is kinda like a side effect if you think of it that way. I have had some times where I just cry and cry, can't do anything so upset so depressed times. If I wasn't terrified of blood I think I would of cut myself heaps by now, I have got a knife out before couldn't do it but did and thought long and hard of ways of ending my life(blood makes me faint even if it's just a tiny bit..haha:) ) and have tried to strangle myself with my scarf as well.. But that was a long time ago now. I LOVE MYSELF !! And am trying so so so hard to be positive :) and have been for at least 2 months now :) some days are still really hard though.

Days can be tough, I have my bad days, the days were I still have the odd anxiety attack. But can I say to all of you out there things do get better I promise :) If I can do it you defiantly can too!!

Love yourself love everyone and everything

And my fab quote that helped me with my ED and anxiety :
Love is greater than the pressure to be perfect :) xoxo